An Ephemeral Rest

I dreamt, and as i dreamed thousands of images flickered burrily in my mind. One of these blury clouds began to take form. It became a man in a colourful, comfortable enviroment. A women stood out in the crowd, and she walked over to him and stood before him. She said to him "I know your past, don't think you can hide behind the mask you wear so comfortably infront of those you love, I know who you are."
The man was stunned but as he stood silently remembering the struggles he had faced in the past, how he resolved his issues and left the life that had treated him so disgracefully. He remembered how he had come to abhor the iniquities in his life and how he washed them clean. "Anything changes in the face of Love" he replied honestly.
Upon hearing this the woman turned to thoughts of her own as she began to comprehend the man's words. Surely enough she had not finished her condemnation and momentarily she turned her focus to him once again and stated "You may have turned parts of your life around because of love, but would you still be here if those around you knew of the transgressions in your past?"
Without hesitation, for it came instantly to his mind, the man answered solemnly "What does our past matter to those who love us now? It's that relentless love that makes our future!"
Hearing this i woke from my ephemeral slumber and began to contemplate the lesson i had learned.

A change in the ordinary

Don't get me wrong i love the ordinary, and the different. I love doing the things i do. Going to school, hanging out with friends, going to youthgroup, going to work, going to church, playing on the computer, chatting to people on Msn Messenger; but i like a change once in a while too. Just because it forces people to do other things, talk to people they don't usually talk to, get put in situations they don't usually face, hear other people's opinions, etc. Today was a day that involved both the same and the change. And i really liked it. I got up in the morning (well this one is debatable as to whether i always do that in the weekends), then went to church. That was the usual. At church the service was different, it finished witha barbeque, but it didnt finish there, although i had to come home because i had to get ready for work, but others stayed behind to listen to a man Ian Brown talk about the changes the church has faced over the last 40 or so years. (correct me if im wrong someone, i was only half awake at church as i missed my pre service coffee) While i was at church i sat next to Logan and Megan who i don't usually sit next to. By the time i was home i was hungry again so i ate my sister's left over pizza. Then very out of the ordinary i pumped up my car tyre and washed the car. At work i had plenty of time to sit back and relax which wasnt very ordinary ( usually i rush around hetically and never have time to stop moving my feet). I finished early and went to church only to find another barbeque on. I helped myself to some fish and some chicken. It was good. (i didnt want any of the cow's buttocks [ in-joke ;) ]) The service was very different, a serman where we all got up the front and watched attentively as Steve showed us the journey from the desert(hope i spelt that one right) into the promised land and the transition out of the ordinary and into the unknown, the change of habbits to a new way, as they crossed the river Jordan. After the service the congregation once more went around the church and looked at all the aspects of the church and how it was developing. Then came Supper at Coffee Culture! This was something that is usual for Opawa and i was very happy to go. To just sit there with the people i love, the people that are my family, to go back to what is my usual, the life i love so much. It was just so good that all the changes took place and then i went back to the old, because although i enjoyed the changes it made me realise how thankful for all the small 'usual' things in my life. Even sitting at coffee culture is a kind of thing i wouldnt want to lose in life because if it's with the people i love then it makes me so glad that God has put me where i am in my life. One of the topics that was talked about whilst sitting at coffee culture was how if people could just fly to Australia or Fiji or wherever would they be on the plane tomorrow? and the truth is, I wouldnt, i love Christchurch, i love the people in it that make me who i am. It's the people i love that influence who i am and shape me to become the person God wants me to be and i wouldnt give that up for the world, because that is the best world taht someone can possible have. A life to the full. The truth is i didnt really want to leave tonight, and when Steve Jaegar said he was going unless i wanted him to stay behind to talk i was very tempted to say yes. There is a bit going on in my head right now and it would have been good to get some of it out for someone else to hear. But anyway i just want to tahnk all the people in my life, for being in my life! Thankyou!!

Update

ive been looking at some verses in Corinthians lately
1Corinthians 5:12
"What business is it of mine to judge those outside the church? Are you not to judge those inside? God will judge those on the outside. 'Expel the wicked man from among you.'"
1 Corinthians 6
"If any of you has a dispute with another [of the church], dare he take it before the ungodly for judgement instead of before the saints? Do you not know the the saints will judge the world? And if you are to judge the world, are you not competent to judge trivial cases? Do you not know that we will judge angels? How much more the things of this life! Therefore, if you have disputes about such matters, appoint as judges even men of little account in the church! I say this to shame you. Is it possible that there is nobody among you wise enough to judge a dispute between believers? But instead, one brother goes to the law against another - and this infront of unbelievers!"

i'll stop here for the moment because i want to share my thoguhts on these verses about judging. The first verse tells us that we should not judge those on the outside, and we know this. but what i was unaware of was that it says we should judge those on the inside, and expel them. Does this mean that we should judge each other? I believe that if we start judging each other then it will be easy to judge those on the outside. I could understand this verse if the word 'expel' was not in it, then i would see the verse as constructive critisism toward each other and accountability. But i find it hard to understand how we should expel those that do wrong, or is it that we should only expel those that refuse to repent, that refuse to accept the responsibility for their wrongdoings?
The second of the judging verses is more about mediation. And personally i think it's a great idea, but then sometimes things cannot be solved just by the church, for example; one of my sister's friends took her camera and got it stolen. That's not so bad, but the thing was he took it without permission when he knew she would have said no. After telling her that it had been stolen he told her that he needed the receipt to take to the police to prove it was his camera and not the theifs. My sister refused because obviously if he had the camera and the receipt then the camera would be his and she would never get it back. So my sister told him that he was to pay for it or get it back for her. He failed to do anything, so she talked to their leader and he couldnt get through to the guy that he had to give the camera back or pay for it, so the only option left was to go to the police. But i think the general idea of it is that our morals are different to a lot of judges, and not all judges are free of corruption. It is better for a christian that knows even the basic laws the bible teaches to mediate a situation that could potentially get out of hand.

moving on to the last verse from Corinthians...
1 Corinthians 14:4
"He who speaks in a tongue edifies himself, but he who speaks prophesies edifies the church. I would like every one of you to speak in tongues but i would rather have you prophesy. He who prophesies is greater than the one that speaks in tongues, unless he interprets, so that the church may be edified."

This verse spoke to me a different way. I found myself wondering if everyone at Opawa could speak in tongues. It is not so much a thing that baptists are good at, using the gifts of the Holy Spirit. Should we be teaching Christians young and old to learn how to speak tongues?

On a lighter note; If you haven't heard of Bonnie Tyler then i suggest strongly taht you listen to her song Total Eclipse of the Heart also known as Bright Eyes and Turn Around. It's a truly great song. I'm sure it brings back some memories for some of the oldies.

Bonfire at the Sand's

Guy Fawkes last night was awesome! ('scuse the spelling) A nice big Bonfire that had a really beautiful flame. It was great to see the horrible little bugs fly towards it and burn to a crisp. Randall stabbed a moth to the end of a used sparkler and held over a fire, then infront of everyone stuffed into his mouth and swallowed. It was reported that later he stated the bug may have been disgusting but he would have prefered to eat that over the happymeal-in-a-blender anyday. There were fireworks, food, movie etc. A great night! A huge motor of pure magnesium was thrown into the bonfire and a huge pure white light resonated from the middle of the bonfire. It was beautiful.

Anyway to other matters. Music. Here is the update of music im listening to a lot of lately, listen to some of it it's great music. God bless good music, the people that make it, and the people that listen to it.
Nickleback - Photograph, Because Of You
Foo Fighters - The Best Of You, What If I Do?, DOA
Audioslave - Be Yourself
Opshop - Levitate, No Ordinary Thing, Saturated
Bebo Norman - Nothing Without You, Disappear
Coldplay - In my place, Fix You, What If

Have a listen to some. If you wanna listen to coldplay go to http://www.Coldplay.com and sign up for free then click on member's tab, then audio and lyrics tab and click x&y cd. Then any song you want to listen to just click on the little astrix (*) on the right of the song name.

Exams...drawing nigh

Less than one week left of school for me. I would be excited but before i enjoy the freedom of the luxurious summer holidays i have a series of exams to contend to. Most of the subjects i have done this year i enjoy learning and although that does make them significantly easier to know the essentials it does not ease the tension of the study i now must face.
Accounting is not what i could call a stronghold of excitement and enjoyment in my schooling career and therefore i am naturally hopeless at it. It is more the fact that i do not feel motivated to learn what i must in it that lets me down. I am sure to drop that next year.
However Chemistry and English i enjoy and they are subjects which will require significantly less studying than others because the cirriculum requires very little compared to my potential of learning in these areas. I was disgraced today when i got a chemistry test back with a failure mark on it. It was an internal unit standard (meaning assessed during the year and either pass or fail based on getting every question or nearly every question correct[no achievement with merit or excellence]). I was disgusted because of the entire test i only got four quetions wrong, two of which i had initially got correct but changed because it looked incorrect. The questions were about finding the pOH of particular concentrates of water and if the assessment had been an achievement standard (results either not achieved, achieved, merit, or excellence) it would have only been achieved questions (the lowest mark). I found the pH of the substances fine. And therefore it showed i could do the problems, and because i had every other question in the test correct i do not think it is fair to be marked as having failed. The problem was not the amount of questions i got wrong but the sections i got the questions wrong in. and of the questions i got wrong all were of the same section. Atleast in chemistry there are resits :) back to the topic of my subjects tho...
Japanese i enjoy but the amount of vocabulary i must learn is huge, i printed it out of the computer after someone sent them to me in a compressed attachment via email and with 44 words on 29 pages thats 1276 words i have to know. Fortunetly i know the majority of them. But only just, i probably need to learn about 400 words in approximately 2 weeks. :(... Statistics is not too hard, i only have to remember what formulas to use and where. I don't intend to spend a lot of time revising for statistics.
Physics i am totally hopeless at. One of the main reasons for this i feel is the amount of work i actually do in class. I admit in physics i sit at the back of the classroom and use it as more of a social period. I feel i will need to spend a lot of time studying physics. I believe i have potential to do resonable at it, with atleast merits. So is that all my subjects? English, Japanese, Chemistry, Physics, Accounting, and Statistics.
So in about two and a half weeks i face my first exams. Oh and i was selected as a Peer Mentor for 2006! Yay i get to help next year's year nines (3rd formers) settle into our school. Should be fun.